On Doors Closed to the Past, and Doors Open to the Future

I was born and raised in Arkansas. Save for a short, 13 month stint at a children's home in VA, I've never lived anywhere else. We Southerners have always been a little too proud of our "southern-ness", and I was....am....no exception! As a child, we always had this special verse we added to the song "This Little Light of Mine" it went like this, "Shine all over Arkansas, I'm gonna let it shine..." I was always rather proud of that verse.

Almost 3 years ago, our little family packed up all our earthly belongings and moved North. After 10 years of submerging my long-suffering husband in the wonderfulness of my home state, the time had come for me to have the tables turned. The other week, my little girls were playing, and the song they were lustily singing suddenly caught my attention - "Shine all over Antrim, I'm gonna let it shine..." Something seemed to hit me in the pit of my stomach! Oh yeah. We really aren't from Arkansas. Most of my children won't even remember being from Arkansas! Ouch.

This morning, I'm feeling that same feeling again. This morning, I will become a member of the Antrim Mennonite Church. It's time, it's necessary, and I'm totally on board with it, but it feels final, like the last nail pounded into the door on the past.

I know in my heart that final nails pounded into doors of the past only means there's a new door open wide to the future, a door God is holding open just for me. So, I'll allow a few tears this morning. I'll allow some sadness for what was, and what might have been. And then I'll dry my tears, hang a pretty wreath on the closed door, and live in the present.