Monday, September 16, 2013
It's 2 a.m. and I'm up for the second time and it was nearly 11 before I climbed in to start with! My head aches and I'm just so.tired. "Please God. Please will you make my baby sleep? Please will you let him stay asleep when I lay him down? I just can't do this anymore! Please God, please....please...." and I find myself pleading for this and pleading for that because, well, I'm t.i.r.e.d. Just so tired! I feel like putty that's been stretched further than humanly possible and at any moment I will snap! And I just can't do this anymore. But really? Really I sound like my 4 yr old and I'm whining! So, I exhale slowly, "Thank You Lord. Thank you for a healthy baby. Thank you for a wonderful husband. Thank you for a school my children enjoy..." As quickly as things come to mind, I spill my thanks and my shoulders slowly relax as the thank yous flow and I sway in the dark while my baby's head droops lower. There is no room in a thankful heart for whining and as my hand unclenches, my heart knows peace!